Thursday, October 30, 2008

NOTICE!!

Well I’ve gone and done it everybody. I finally gave notice at work. I know some of you got that information in an email, but whatever, you have to see it here now too. Poor you! Ha ha. My last day will be November 26th, and I am happy that I will not have to worry about this job around the holidays anyway. I mean I’ll have other worries, of course, but at least it won’t be about a job I no longer care about. Go me. So blue barbell in today, I got a flexible one that has a little bit of give to it. Took the soccer ball out last night as the flat part on top was bugging my mouth a bit too much. Plus Kerry told me I was talking funny, which I hardly think would be great while I am doing interviews for my new part time job. Speaking of which, I know Tiffany is hooking me up by talking to someone she knows at Starbucks, but if any of you have any ideas on where I should work for my part-time job, please feel free to throw them my way. I’ve also applied at Costco and Home Depot. I would really like to work at home depot because a)I have home repairs I’d like to make and figure I’d learn something and b) it’s really close to home. Aside from soccer and visiting the Hicks and my sister, I could probably get away without using my car much at all. That would be awesome (for our wallet as well as for the environment, how convenient). So most everyone that has heard my plans for going to become a nurse have been very supportive. Those of you that know me best know that I am sometimes squeamish, but I am determined to overcome this in my schooling of course, so buck up and move on, right? Lyrics quote for the day: “These are the things that I miss, These are not times for the weak of heart, These are the days of raw despondence, And I never dreamed I would have to lay down my torch for you like this” xoxo

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

1 month and counting..

It’s time for another update into my very exciting life, I know you have all been waiting on the edge of your seats for this blog post, so I will try not to keep you in suspense much longer. Monday night, Kerry and I spent some time at my sister’s house, I was pretty stressed about financing for school but let me tell you, holding that baby for an hour plus pretty much erased all the stress in me. She was sleeping the entire time, not like she did much, but hey, she still took the stress away. Maybe mothers should pimp out their newborns as the new stress relievers! Just kidding. Last night, I was at work until six, but then had to leave to go pickup my new glasses. They are so damn cute, I am almost tempted to post a picture of myself in them, but don’t think I will, at least not on here. Check me out on facebook, maybe I will put them there. After that, I left Seattle to head towards home. Decided to stop at the supermall on my way home to pick up some spare tongue barbells (after the fiasco I had Sunday morning, sheesh). So I got, get this, a soccer ball barbell. It’s so cute, I love it. Yes, I am obsessed with soccer leave me alone. It’s my one THING if that makes sense. Everyone has a thing, right? I took a business writing class yesterday at work. I was dreading it, I mean really I don’t care about my business writing as I do not get to do much of it anyway and my boss wants to see and edit everything we send out before we send it. So really, my own style doesn’t get to come through anyway. Okay enough about that, back to the class. It was scheduled from 1-5, and I thought oh god, four hours of hell, but it turned out to be better than I expected, which is a good thing. I think I will be able to apply some of it to my classes for when I am back in school. Woohoo! Today I have been doing a lot of work since I got here at 830 (mostly because nobody is emailing me to distract me, so I have nothing else to do but work, good god). I have more training today, personal physical training that is, not work related training. Song lyrics for today:” Virginia is for lovers, And I wonder where do all the others go, And your heart belongs to another, And I'm leaving, Virginia is for lovers anyway” xoxo-LC

Monday, October 27, 2008

Just another manic monday..

Whew, I can’t believe the weekend is over already. It feels like I packed a lot into two short days, but maybe that’s because I did. Ha ha. So, Saturday I spent cleaning house, doing SOME laundry, and basically cleaning up the outside of the house to get it ready for the bbq on Saturday night. This outside cleaning included pulling the last stump, breaking up the branches that were in the backyard that needed to go in the yard waste, and of course pressure washing the garage, outside of the front of the house, driveway and the back porch. Oh my gosh the back porch looks like its almost new, that’s how clean it looked. Oh and I mowed and edged the lawn in the front, plus mowed in the back yard as well. Holy hell we have a family of moles living in our backyard or something. Obviously they really love our backyard area. And of course, I could do something about that, but all I can think about are all the moles my stepdad Socko killed using gasoline, fires and firecrackers…yeah don’t ask. Tiff knows what I’m talking about here. So Sunday, minor crisis. Went to tighten my barbell and the top ball broke off in my hand. I made Kerry ride with me as I drove to the tattoo parlor with my tongue sticking out like an idiot. She replaced the ball on the top, but we also tried a smaller barbell. The 1/2'’ was just a bit too small, and they were out of their extra jewelry, but I really liked having a smaller one in so I have got to go find one that is longer than 1/2” but smaller than ¾” which is what I have in right now. So on Sunday also had Niko’s birthday party at the Y and a soccer game in Federal Way at 7pm (which we totally kicked ass at). Oh yeah, at the bbq, I had patron again. And no, I didn’t end up an emotional mess for once, which is awesome. Oh and I didn’t really have a hangover either, which is even better. And yummy, I made bbq salmon and for my first try it tasted so great (even though it didn’t look the prettiest), but yum, I loved it. I think a good time was had by all, at least I hope it was. Oh and my right big toe is broken (or sprained), it looks hideous. It’s black and blue on top, due to some soccer injuries and then wrestling with Trina on Saturday night it got bent back and I think that aggravated it. But hey, crazy ass soccer players, we play through those injuries, no matter what. “THERE IS NO CRYING IN SOCCER” Yeah that phrase sounds familiar. And the thought to leave you with today is: “I wanna love like Johnny and June, Rings of fire burnin' with you, I wanna walk the line, Walk the line, 'Till the end of time, I wanna love, Love ya that much, Cash it all in, Give it all up, When you're gone, I wanna go too, Like Johnny and June” xoxo

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Filled?

Well I have reached the “sweet spot” as they call it in lapband world. I am at a good restriction point, right now I’ve mostly been able to get my protein shakes down and the occasional jamba juice smoothie (although these take quite a bit longer than just the protein shakes). Since Tuesday I have lost 3 more lbs. I realize that this may be mostly water weight, but who the hell cares, the scale moving down is the scale moving down, good lord people. Am having a barbecue on Saturday night. Originally was going to just have it kind of ghetto like with burgers and hot dogs, but then decided that would not be much fun… for ME!!! Hello, and we know that is who it is all about. So now I am going to bbq some salmon, which I am supposed to be able to eat, fingers crossed. Should be a good turnout too, so I am happy to have some friends over for some good times, good drinks (or shots for those of us with very little stomach openings) and good eats (I hope). Ha ha. My little monkey, Niko man, is turning 3 on Tuesday. Oh wait, so is our friend Terry, I mean its his birthday, not that he’s turning 3. Ha ha. Birthday party for Niko on Sunday at the Y, which should be fun, cause it was last year too. I can’t believe he is 3 already and Devan is 6, where the hell does time go. It seems like one minute you’re holding them on your chest, taking naps with them, then suddenly they are all into Jonas brothers, Hannah Montana, and WordWorld, what the heck?!?! Or it gets even worse, they want a cell phone, their own cell phone….for all those important phone calls they have to make. Oh wait, I do remember that from my own age, I wanted a pager like nobody’s business. My mom thought I wanted to be a drug dealer..yeah right mom. Turns out I just wanted to be like a doctor or something. Okay, just a nurse.

Monday, October 20, 2008

Posting, Posting...

Hi there, its me again. And yes before any of you ask, I am typing this at work in Word again, hence all the capitalized correctness. *sigh* stupid word, just let me type whatever I want to type, doesn’t word get it?!? Oh wait, life and the world dont get it, why would I expect a computer software program to understand? Fun weekend, well sort of. Spent about nine hours with peep at my sisters house on Saturday. They were in new parent meltdown mode, too little sleep, too much baby fussing. Go figure. Sunday, I got to sit around, read and watch a bit of tv before heading off to a candle part at my soccer girl, jessa’s house. That was fun, but then stopped back by to see peep for a bit before heading to my game in federal way. We played a tough team, and they had two subs (we of course had none), but we ended up winning 2-1, so I was pretty dang stoked. And my evening ended pretty well after that too…. Today at work has been fairly non-exciting. I have been working on a document retention project, which I am glad to have as it is busy work and keeps my mind busy, however its not terribly intellect stretching. Ha ha. Oh and I also went and ordered new glasses. They are sooo cute, I can’t wait to show them off to everyone. Plus they ended up being the lesser expensive of the two I was looking at, which means they didn’t end up costing me 3 billion dollars. Tomorrow is fill #5 for me. I should be getting close to restriction by now, so hopefully fingers crossed this one will work for me the way its supposed to. I am driving in to work tomorrow, leaving for my appointment, and then coming back to work until I leave to go get my haircut down in Tacoma. Whew, lots of driving!! Xoxo-LC

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Peep says Hi

okay well she doesnt really say hi, because hello, shes only four days old. i mean hello people, she is most likely brilliant of course, but that is just impossible. she slept in my arms for three hours, i think it might be love. so soccer was good last night. we tied our game, but hell, they had to loan us players because we didnt have very many and then one of our guys took a ball hard right to his eyeball and he ended up leaving the game and going to the ER. That is the second guy in two weeks (week prior was john with his stitches to his eyebrows poor dude). And john was back playing this next week, what a crazy psycho. oh, and this is not the john that you all know in my life, just fyi. got home around 11 last night, played some batman on the wii and went to bed around 2am this morning. played that again this morning when i got up and then headed up to my sisters house to hang up with peep. :) she is too dang cute. xoxo-LC

Friday, October 17, 2008

missed one

Alas dear readers, I did not mean to keep you in suspense of another exciting edition of my blog. However, soccer games being what they are, and then of course after soccer party celebrations being what they are, conspired last night to prevent me from returning home until almost midnight. I went out after soccer with Jess, Sarah & Celina (Kim, of the birthday cupcake fame having already been scheduled previously to a dinner with her husband and father, whatever) to Canyons restaurant in Redmond. For the love of god, we had the worst bartender/waiter dude that I have ever had in my life. At first we just thought he sucked, but no, after much reflection (as it took him almost an hour and four repeated attempts of asking for it to get the bill) we came to the conclusion that he was definitely “ON SOMETHING” as they say. Needless to say, it felt like an episode of the twilight zone and we seriously thought we might not be able to leave the place. But, leave we did, and I managed to make it home, only to have a slight breakdown on the way home (yeah, pms & music conspiring against me) and i ended up in a crying jag that would not stop for at least twenty minutes after I returned home. *sigh* will it ever end. So I found out yesterday that now the doctor does not believe I have a leak. They believe that what fluid I have been losing is due the processing of doing the fills, so I go back in on Tuesday for another fill. Hopefully this will provide me with better restriction, which means more weight loss, which means a leaner meaner fighting machiner….ME!! Ha ha. Seriously though, I just want to be faster when I run when I am playing soccer, that is all what its about. Some of you will probably notice that my spelling/grammar/correct use of cases is more accurate in this post. That is because I am typing it in Word and transferring over to blogger when I am completed, and word being what it is it automatically corrects how I would like to be typing. How annoying. Okay so time for the emotional deep thinking portion of my blog, I know you have all desperately been waiting for it, and who am I to disappoint (of course assuming any of you actually think I can be emotionally deep, I prefer to think of myself as emotionally shallow…or just shallow in general). Anyway, I try to think of myself as a good person, sometimes I succeed at actually being one. Sometimes I do not. But when I am in the throws of one of those trips down into the deep dark well, I often wonder why me, why is it me that has to feel this way, why is it me that has to experience the things I am experiencing, and what is the point to it all?!? Now, normally we sometimes question, existentially, our existence. This is not what I mean. I mean the sense of what I have done wrong, karmically, in my past or present, which has now caught up with me and has a firm hold on one foot to keep me grounded at the entrance to that dark well. And when someone hurts me, being the not nice person I am, I secretly wish that they would hurt too. That makes me bad right? If you believe wholeheartedly in something, accept it as the truth of what is and what will be, how do you hold on long enough until that truth comes into existence? How do you make people around you see and feel the truth of that also? Okay enough for now.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Six Minutes

ive only got six minutes six minutes....to save the world...just kidding. six minutes until the timer goes off for the cupcakes i am baking. tomorrow is kims birthday, she is a friend of mine and one of my soccer buddies. i am making cupcakes with green frosting (like grass get it) and then putting chocolate sprinkles on them (like turf nubs get it) and then soccer ball candies go right on the top (like soccer...ok you got it). i know, completely a nerd, but hey shes been a great friend to me and this is her first birthday without her mom around, so i am trying to make it a good one. will give them to her to celebrate right before or during half time or after our game (can you tell i am undecided). so today i didnt get to work until almost 920 am. oops my bad. so not a huge deal of course since i have the worlds longest case of short timers disease ever. but then i ended up getting in trouble with my boss, not for having been out so much, but because i didnt prioritze my work the way she wanted me to. oh well, i am sorry, but i didnt really have an excuse to give her, which i think irritated her more. go figure. and although i was slightly annoyed/upset about it, i also didnt really care. what an interesting mix of emotions. went to see frances again today at the hospital, she is still cute and so far my nickname has stuck. peep, thats what i am calling her. she is such a quiet mellow baby that that is pretty much the only noise she makes, peep peep. although she did get hiccups today and made quite a bit more noise, but hey, she is still peep to me. oh hey, less than a minute left on the cupcakes and i am not done typing....hold please. okay cupcakes on the rack now cooling off. next step will be making a mess...i mean making green frosting! so lets see, i am waiting to hear back from the financial aid office, we all know how quickly they work. and i am also looking into private loans. not necessarily the way i want to go, but will do what i need to do to make it through school with good grades and what not. so on another note, things that i hate. people who cannot freaking drive, for the love of god, if its not your strongpoint (and you know if it is or not) then get the hell off the road please! secondly, people who use words incorrectly. if you do not know what it means, do not try to sound impressive by using it, i will just think you are more stupid than you probably are and it drives me crazy. lastly, people who say one thing and do another completely, now granted i do this sometimes, we all do. however its people who do it on major things that effect peoples emotions that bother me, well mostly my emotions, but you know what i mean. why do something that you knows hurt people, why not do the right thing? xoxo_LC

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Baby's Here!

baby Frances Mae has finally arrived. none of us got much sleep but she did arrive at 10:07 this morning. she is gorgeous, and luckily enough its true, i didnt even have to lie just to make her mom feel better. ha ha. she was 8lbs 1 oz and 20 1/2 inches long. she was definitely not a first time crier and screamer that is for sure. i think her nickname right now from me is peep, thats what she sounds like when she cries, a peep. i am not sure why i decided to blog tonight. i am most likely more sensitive than normal and definitely more emotional, so maybe blogging isnt the best idea, but hey, has that ever stopped me before? a couple of different things that i was thinking about in my sleep deprived last couple of days. one) when a pregnant woman delivers a baby does she still feel the child within her womb? is it like what they say about amputee patients, that they feel the missing limb long after it has been removed. or along those lines, what if it is an emotional amputation? remember those first loves of your life, that when the relationships eventually ends (as it always does), but you swear that you can still feel their touch, can still feel the hint of their scent on the breeze, does your heart jump because you think that it is them? is it like that when you suffer the death of a lover, that you think that they are still there, can still feel them. two) do you celebrate the anniversary of "things" ever? not the average normal things that people celebrate like anniversaries or births or deaths, but say the anniversary of starting a diety, the day you got a surgery, or perhaps the first time you did something random? sunday was one of those days for me, an anniversary of an event. and it came at a time when the memory of the event is still both wonderful and bittersweet. that sucks. three) should i grow my hair back out or should I keep it short? i like thinking of myself as a nurse with my hair pulled back and then releasing it at the end of the day, setting it free in a sexy hair commercial kind of day. at the same time, i do it every day when it is short. hmm, such a quandry. four) with the arrival of frances, i had people asking me what it felt like to finally be an aunt. (now my pardons to those of you that did ask this, it is not directed at anyone specifically) begging everyones indulgence, but I AM ALREADY AN AUNT. then people would say yeah, but a blood aunt. I AM A BLOOD AUNT. I would give my blood to Trina, Devan or Niko in a hearbeat and i think that makes me their aunt, blood relative or not. on top of that, it just irritated me that people would think less of that relationship than it is. but i cant fault people for just not understanding the depths of my feelings when it comes to that. some people do know that, i know that much (like tiff). well thats likely enough for now, more tomorrow. xoxo-Lacey Canyon

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Life, uncovered..

well i had my xray on friday morning. found out that i apparently do not have a large leak, but a slow leak. this means its likely that the fluid is leaking out slowly over time. i have an appointment with the doctor (surgeon that is) on thursday to find out what this means as far as getting it fixed. i am not sure what the fix is for a slow leak but i will definitely keep you posted. as i tried to explain this to tiffany and will, will of course had to make the reference to the fact that the lapband creates a type of sphincter within your body and then of course the joke was that i have a leaky sphincter. yummy thought right? ha ha. tiffany's birthday was on the 8th. i decided as part of her birthday celebration week that she should come work out with my trainer with me on saturday. good god, i think he was trying to show her how much he can punish me within one hour. it was hellish, or at least today it feels like someone pounded my body with a meat pulverizer. i already texted tiffany to see how she was doing and yeah...about the same as me. she has to work today and i dont so that is one benefit, although how the hell i am going to force my legs to run at soccer should be interesting to see. i watched my recorded episodes of the biggest loser today. so many of those episodes (and especially conversations between jillian and her people) focus on the fact that many of the people have never taken the time to put themselves first, to care for themselves. i wonder how many of us are just like that, caregivers, ones that are willing to put themselves last for the ones they love? how often have i spent in the last few months trying to determine what i want, what i need, and what will make me most happy. perhaps like so many other things this is harder to do than it seems. what if,the thing that makes us happiest in the world, is caring for those we love. what if caring for the ones you love is taken away from you, then what happens? then perhaps you are forced to focus on taking care of yourself, the best way you can quickly learn how. when i was younger i used to moan and whine about how unfair life is. and it is of course, but it is unfair to pretty much everyone. even people that seem like they have it all, they have problems too. someone who looks like they are in the happiest relationship of their life, you can learn that deep down they harbor secrets they would never tell their partner, fantasies they would never share, and feelings they would try to conceal at all costs. so i think, no matter how unfair life is, we all do our best to bump along and not hurt as many people as we can. love where we can, when we can, to the best of our ability. xoxo-LC PS_LC is soon to be an aunt. I will keep you all posted on the blessed event happening soon!

Monday, October 06, 2008

Clear Balls-2!!

now now get your mind out of the gutter. i went to have the bottom ball on my tongue ring changed out from a silver ball to a clear one, so now there are two clear balls. i was going to have the barbell sized down but the girl who was working the piercing counter today said there is still a bit of swelling to my tongue (not noticeable by sight just by touch) and that she would recommend sizing it down in another two weeks or so just to be safe. no worries from this end, i like having the two clear balls though, you know me, anal retentive, like stuff to match. go figure. so i had a one on one meeting with my boss today. its amazing how calm and relaxed i can be while talking about goals when i know that in less than 3 months i will be gone from there. oh yeah, for those i have not told, im going back to school in january. i am applying for nursing school so in january i start taking the prerequisite courses to be on track for that. i have already got one person who will write me a letter of recommendation, is anyone up for writing me a second one? if you are, you let me know, i need all the help i can get. so ever have one of those days when things just seem okay but really are not? i do not know, its hard to explain, but today was an okay day, i got a lot of work done, had dinner, watched tv and am soon heading to bed. but there is still something that was off or missing. who knows, probably the crazies in my head trying to escape. stay away, stay far far away... xoxo

Sunday, October 05, 2008

Crazy Beautiful

so, let's see. didn't get home until 6:30am this morning. now naturally you would think i was out partying, right, those of you who know me know that i am such a big partyer! but of course not, i was helping do inventory at kerry's store and that is what time i got home. ugh. so i did not go to my soccer game, as playing after only about 4 hours of sleep just did not seem appealing to me. so after waking up around 1pm this afternoon i have so far managed to accomplish the following: watch law and order, watch lipstick jungle, watch crouching tiger hidden dragon, balance the checkbook (or not balance it as the case may be) and am now at 5:30pm thinking of going to take a shower. yes i know you are all overwhelmed by my motivation, i know that i am. i am thinking of going to the grocery store soon too, perhaps even making dinner. i think that will cap off my activities for the day. oh, unless i decide to bake cookies, which i am thinking about doing also. thinking....thats a problem for me isnt it. you see, things can seem to be going along just fine but then my mind it just starts to wander and wonder. i think that maybe thats what gets me into half (or more) of the problems i get myself into. does anyone besides me ever wonder if there is another life out there for them, perhaps something else they were meant to be doing? maybe its just me, it likely is, sometimes i feel like i am outside of my own body, i see the things happening around me and yet i feel helpless to stop them. like watching a movie where you cannot control the ending, it just has to happen the way it is supposed to. but what if you know what the ending is but you do not know how to get there, to arrive at that ending in one piece, scarred perhaps, but alive. i dont know people, i am just thinking, too much as usual. "You can be anywhere when your life begins. When the future opens up in front of you. And you may not even realize it at first, but it's already happening." LC