Thursday, August 28, 2008


they say hope springs eternal, but i am not sure they ever really met me before they said that. or perhaps they did. is it human nature do you think, to constantly believe the best, to hope for the best possible outcome even when it seems as though all hope is lost? sometimes it feels that way. i think of it this way, when someone dies we use all sorts of phrases to comfort people in their time of grief. many of these phrases suggest that the person is still there, watching over us, waiting for us, giving us hope that they are not really gone forever. is this not the epitome of that belief, that hope should still live on, even when all reason and science has shown us that that hope is not to be born out? this is the problem that i face on a daily basis i think, reality and reason versus feeling and intuition. *sigh* will i ever get it right? so to give you all an update from yesterdays story, my manly friend ray did fix the chainsaw. he also showed me how to fix it should the chain decide to throw itself from the saw yet again in a fit of temper. oh and he told me that the oil chamber was completely dry and that is a bad thing so he oiled it. he also kept asking me questions about it like how tight was it before when did it last have oil, etc...hellllloooo reminder....NOT my chainsaw. i have no idea. ha ha. but the chainsaw is well lubed now and hanging out in the back of my car waiting to finish hacking up the bush-tree in my front yard. awesome! so being the dork that i am, i am watching 101 dalmations, but not the old cartoon kind, i'm watching the live version with the actual dogs and such. oh my gosh could the dogs and puppies be any cuter!! of course its now almost over, but hey, i still think those puppies are pretty cute...and that is something fun and happy for once. so back to my music subject, on top of having songs pop into my head at random times, i also have lyrics that just seem to keep playing in my head..."I'm so tired of being here. Suppressed by all my childish fears. And if you have to leave, I wish that you would just leave. Cause your presence still lingers here. And it won't leave me alone." for those of you that dont know, that is evanescence, my immortal. i havent even listened to it in awhile, yet there it is, circling around in my head. oh well, i guess just roll with the punches, right? happy thursday everyone.

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